North, this is a guide for you to navigate Subliminal Affective Control and self-accommodation.
A Note from Your Father:
I never figured out this Subliminal Affective Control from Jenni until long after we were divorced. I am so driven by explicit, on-the-surface language, I was unprepared for this non-verbal influence; I didn't even know it was a thing. You don't have to be as slow a learner as me.
Also, don't see this as choosing me over James/Jenni. For you to really confront and be successful in this challenge, you are going to need to choose your Heavenly Father and dig deep in yourself for this fight for the wholesome, healthy, lawful things He wants in His servants.
You have been living in an unconsciousness feedback loop. James and Jenni are highly uncomfortable around healthy, vibrant, wholesome and hetero.
The feedback loop has been that they exhibit visible signs of discomfort in their facial expressions, body language and nonverbal sound cues. You as a sensitive person that responds to another's discomfort adjusts yourself till their signs of discomfort go away. Unconscious of this process, you adjusted yourself to a point of appearing less healthy to accommodate their visible discomfort.
If the above is even somewhat correct, your wellbeing is at risk and is suffering in service to making their unhealthy sensibilties feel normalized. A plan to undo this in a gentlemanly and considerate manner is what is presented below.